As people age and health issues become more prevalent, they may eventually require assisted living, such as moving to an assisted living facility, nursing home, or moving in with their adult child.
Learning how to care for an elderly parent in your home is a kind and generous thing to do.
Moving your parent into your home is a big decision with many benefits and challenges. It can help you bond with your parent, save money compared to assisted living facilities, help your parent avoid isolation, and ensure their safety and comfort.
It can also be difficult to create new routines, will change the dynamic of the household, and the added responsibility of being a caregiver can be overwhelming and hard to adapt to.
These tips can help the process of caring for your elderly parent in your home go more smoothly.
When to Intervene with Elderly Parents
The first step is determining if you need to intervene in your parent’s care and move your parent into your home.
You may be considering moving your parent into your home because of gradual declining health, a recent medical emergency, or a newly diagnosed illness.
No matter the reason, you will need to monitor and access your parent’s activities of daily living (ADLs) and instrumental activities of daily living (IADLs) to determine if they are capable of taking care of their daily needs and living independently.
Use our guide and checklist to assess their ADLs.
Talk to your parent, talk to their doctors, and observe them. Create a list of everything that your parent needs help with. This will allow you to determine how much assistance they need on a daily or weekly basis.
Meet with your parent, siblings, spouse, children, etc… to discuss what care needs to be given and decide if moving your parent into your home is the right decision for your family.
How to Prepare Your Home
If you have now all mutually decided that your parent will move in, the next step is preparing your home.
Where will they be staying? Will you add another bedroom or bathroom? Will you be converting the garage? Will they move into a guest room or someone’s current room?
There is no right answer. Find the option that works best for your situation.
Make Sure Your Home Is Safe
Part of deciding the new living arrangements will be ensuring that your home is safe for your elderly parent.
Your parent may need to stay mainly or entirely on one level, which means finding a way for their bedroom, bathroom, and kitchen to all be on the same floor.
Other safety concerns include clearing clutter from walkways, removing all rugs, cords, or other tripping hazards, and making sure everything they need is within reach so they don’t need to reach up or bend down.
Take a look at the CDC’s Home Fall Prevention Checklist.
Household Equipment to Purchase
Purchasing assistive equipment can help your parent be more independent and comfortable. This also means less required caregiving for you.
Safety Devices
Another way to ensure that your home is safe is to consider purchasing safety devices, such as:
- Emergency alert system like LifeAlert or MobileHelp Fall Detector
- Home security system
- Automatic shut-off device for the stove
- Additional lights, such as nightlights or even motion-sensing lights.
- Bed railings
Mobility equipment
- Reaching tools
- Walkers
- Canes
- Wheelchairs
- Ramps
- Electric rising chairs
- Stairlifts
- Adjustable bed
Dressing and grooming equipment
- Non-tie shoelaces or velcro shoes
- Button hooks
- Zipper pulls
- Long-handled shoe horns
- Long handle combs or brushes
Adapted phones
Phones that are voice-operated, have large buttons, or have text capability for people that have difficulty hearing.
Bathing equipment
- Walk-in bathtub or shower
- Shower chairs
- Grab bars
- Bathtub transfer bench
- Handheld shower head
- Pumps for shampoo and body wash
- Products to help with going to the bathroom
- Adult diapers
- Commodes
- Toilet seat risers
- Waterproof mattress or mattress pads
- Bidet toilet seats so they can get clean even if they have trouble wiping
Medication assistance
Pill cutters or crushers can help with taking medication.
To help remind your parent to take their medicine, you can stick with a simple pillbox, set alarms, or go more advanced with an automatic pill dispenser.
- Kitchen aids
- Electric can opener
- Safety knives
- Utensils with large handles
- Cups with two handles
- Long straws
- Plate guards
Talk to your parent about which of these products they think would make life easier and that they would be willing to use.
You can also ask their doctor or consult with a physical or occupational therapist.
Tips for Taking Care of Elderly Parents in Your Home
If you’re newly taking on the experience of assisting a loved one in your home, take a moment to review some helpful tips and advice.
Research Caregiver Responsibilities and Your Options
Research what the caregiving responsibilities you are taking on entail, their medical conditions, and local resources and care providers.
Keep Communication Open
You, your family, and your parent will all need to communicate with each other.
Moving into their child’s home may make them feel like they are losing independence or being a burden. Try to be patient, empathetic, and honest with your parent.
Talk about your expectations, fears, goals, and any issues that arise.
Set boundaries and figure out how to respect each other’s privacy.
Set a Realistic Schedule
After you have assessed your parent’s needs and talked to them, hopefully, you understand the level of caregiving that will be required.
Now you need to determine how much care you can provide while still having time for work, other family commitments, and your own self-care.
Be realistic here. You do not need to be the only caregiver, but you need to set a schedule for who will be looking after them.
Ask for Help
Ask other family members or family friends to help, such as running errands, preparing a meal, housekeeping, or being your parent’s caregiver for a day or weekend.
You can also look into classes and activities at your local senior center or adult day programs so that your parents can socialize and be active while they get the care they need during the day and you get a break.
Get Financial Assistance
Caring for your parent can be expensive.
Another way that family can help is by sharing the added financial costs of caring for your parent.
Talk to your parent about using some of their retirement to help with the cost of being a caregiver.
You can also look into government assistance and see about being paid for serving as your parent’s caregiver.
Coping with the Stress of Caring for an Elderly Parent
Being a caregiver is stressful. It is important that you develop good coping skills to maintain your well-being and avoid caregiver burnout.
Be kind to yourself and don’t neglect your own health.
Get enough sleep, eat a healthy diet, drink enough water, exercise, socialize, have fun, and practice relaxation techniques.
You may also consider seeking professional help developing coping skills by seeing a therapist.
Consider Hiring a Professional
Now that you know the bare minimum on how to care for an elderly parent in your home, have set a realistic schedule, and talked to your parent, you may realize that you need to also hire a caregiver.
Home care provides customized service for whenever you need care. They can help out with light housekeeping, meal preparation, provide transportation, or offer companionship.
Home care professionals can also provide personal care to help your parent with their daily needs or provide respite care to help you avoid caregiver burnout.
Pacific Angels Home Care can help care for your elderly parents in the Santa Cruz and Monterey Bay area. Give us a call today at (831) 708-2876 or reach us online.
